Disconnected...

It scares me how hard it is to stay connected with the people we love in a world that is so focused on communications. I've been feeling really disconnected lately. I check my Facebook account every day, Twitter, email, other social networks, forums, RSS feeds, text messages, voice mail, I hang out with friends or talk to them on the phone... someone stop me!

I don't know if it's simply because I'm sick and tired of having a relationship that's limited to phone calls or online conversations and because he's coming home in a few days, I don't see the point in messaging or calling anymore. I'd rather wait until he's home to actually talk face to face. I feel like just cocooning into a wee ball in the corner until Friday -that would be pure bliss...

How are you supposed to know the best way to get a hold of someone with all this choice?! ei : When I need to tell Jf something, I need to think first if he's at work, consider the time zones, wonder if it's something that would be best dicussed on the phone or if an email would be better to keep track of ideas... then I can either message him on MSN, text him, call him, email him or message him on Facebook. Chances are he'd get the text alot quicker if he's not at work but if he is, an email would do the trick. If he's at home, I can message him on MSN to see if he's there, then if not, I'll message him on Facebook to make sure he gets it later. I know where/when to message him what/where because I know him and know his habits (somewhat)... This means that he needs to check ALL of these things to make sure he gets ALL the messages from everyone.

Salvation : RSS Feeds. I'm all for online networking (It would be kind of stupid of me not to be!) and I think it's awesome to have that freedom of expression. RSS feeds saved my life when it comes down to it! With the amount of work and energy I pour into these kinds of web-based communities, I don't have time to read everything that comes up or spend hours catching up on every last little detail. I enjoy what I do and I don't want to grow sick of it because I'm bitting off more than I can chew. I found a balance and the RSS feeds showed me the way.

We are robbing eachother of so much time. Why do we do it? To save time. We're creating "easier" ways to communicate and share but we're also creating more time consuming tasks. One step forward, two steps back, if you ask me!

Confused Pedestrian Crossing

Does anyone remember the little educational videos they make you watch when your a kid so you won't get run over crossing the street?

"Look over on the left, then right, then left again, then if you can't see any cars, you can start walking. If you can see a car, wait."

If you ever move to Saskatchewan, scratch that! You can see the cars coming for MILES and it gets damn confusing!

It's a straight street, I can see the car but I know it won't be here for another 2 minutes. I have plenty of time to cross the street, do the chicken dance and walk back and forth a couple times but that little voice in my brain still says I should wait because I can SEE the car and it's coming towards me. So I stand there, not too sure if I should cross or not and I can picture the driver going "Are ya' gonna cross the street or are ya gonna stand there for days?!" and I don't like it.

I'm curious to see an educational video to teach Saskatchewan kids to cross the street... and I will secretly take notes.

Even a simple walk to the "dépaneur" out here is a culture shock!

Sunny Saturday

Finally, a decent day in Moose Jaw! The weather was normal, for once. No wind, sun and decent temperature. Hurray! It was so motivating to be able to wear shorts for the FIRST TIME this year. Not a moment too soon...

I had an overall productive day. I did some random stuff around the house I've been putting off until the very last moment and just relaxed and "caught up" on some sleep. Of course, Js is coming home in less than a week *clappy hands* so my sleeping patterns are in the shitter.

I squealed with excitement and had to hold back some tears of happiness when I realized today, that I would probably be seeing Maggie sometime soon. Maybe not right away, but at least it's closer than "sometime next year"... She's on her way to her new home right now and it's within reasonable driving distance for weekend visits for us! It's so relieving to know she'll be so close again and I won't feel so lost in the prairies. She's waited so long for this and I'm so excited for her, can't wait to visit each other!

The week went by REALLY fast and next week will probably be crazy too! I've got a million plans AND work AND Js' return on Friday.

Then, onwards with another crazy busy week as I get used to having Js home again and he settles in at home again... Never a dull moment really...

Long weekend goodness.

AH! Long weekend! I can't recall the last time I was able to enjoy/notice a long weekend! I didn't have to worry if my store was open or closed, or run around trying to catch up on life. I'm all caught up and I can kick back and relax. Somewhat.

I promised I would help some friends move later this afternoon, but right now, I'm just enjoying a nice cup of coffee and looking at the mess that is my kitchen. Oy! Jello shots are a messy messy thing! Last night was good though, lots of laughs AND I didn't try to claw at some guys face at the bar. Go me! I'm growing. I never used to flip out this much back home but I guess I had some comfort and I was more confidant so I dealt with the lack of respect much differently. Here, I just snap at random, rude, disrespectful, stinky, misogynistic bastards on the dance floor. No tolerance. I'll get over it, someday. I also met a load of new people last night which was good, except for Rude McTudeFace who didn't even say Hi or Bye... He won't be hanging out here again. What evs.

I really wish Js was here this weekend but I'm thrilled he'll get to visit his buddies in Montreal. For some reason, I'm convinced there's a whoreload more happening in Montreal than in Moose Jaw for May 2-4. Seriously.

Today, I'm helping out some friends move into a new Q. I'm really happy for them, it's definitely an upgrade and it's much closer to our house! Teehee! Sure, we won't be able to spy on them anymore because there's other Qs in the way... but it's a good trade!

Tomorrow and Monday, I've got my work load cut out for me! There's a ton of stuff I've been wanting to do since Js left and of course I've been putting it off until the last minute.

Before Js left for C-Wall, I asked him if he could clear out the table we put in the basement and bring it upstairs for me so I could set up a mini office. How logical is it to have an extra table downstairs while he's gone and won't use it while I'm here sitting in a wicker chair with my lappy on my knees. Of course, the table is still downstairs and I get pins and needles in my legs about two minutes after sitting down. *suck* I was feeling moody and sad one night and I gave him HELL about not helping me out with this before he left. I told him that I would just do it myself and I didn't need his help. Well... now I've bitched myself into a corner because I still haven't done it (his stuff is ALL over it -total pain!) and he's back in two weeks and I know I'll never ever hear the end of it because I gave him such a hard time about it.

I also thought I would clean his car for him and be a good girlfriend. He did drive 14hrs straight to go get Jack in Winterpeg so it's the least I can do! :) I thought about getting the car detailed, but I've only been working for a week and there's so many more things we could use the mulah for (like a computer desk for moi), why wouldn't I do it myself! :) There is still some cat food back there... so it desperately needs to get done, one way or another. The weather is nice, why not! I'm an awesome girlfriend! :)

I have a To-Do list that goes on for days... but I like it. It's all stuff I enjoy doing and look forward to. I've been slaving away working at my brain child for the last two weeks. Since I started working, it's harder and harder to stay on top of things but I'm getting there. This weekend is WAY too nice to work on that though, unless I figure a way to bring the lappy outside. We really need to buy a hub.

I better get crackin' soon, laundry is just about done my coffee ain't gonna drink itself!
Happy May 2-4, world!

Lost ramblings... *possible spoilers*

I figured I would post my ramblings on here as I will otherwise bore the entire world with them for the next month. Might as well get it off my chest now and hope I can contain my excitement (rage!) until January! (How unfair is it that we have to wait this long!?)

For the longest time (Seasons 1 and 2) I figured the whole point of the show was "we" were being monitored by the Darma Initiative. Observing our reaction to something we were presented with but had no explanation for. Now, I wonder if the writers thought "Wanna know how many viewers will catch on if we convince them they can't predict what's going on but really, we already showed them the ending!?" and are now rolling in giant giant piles of money. I love them for it.

So this is my version of what the hell is going on on that damn island. It may be totally wrong but who cares. Here's what I've got as of Season 5 Finale.

What's the dealio with Faraday's book?
His Mom gave him the book she got from him when she shot him, 30 years prior to giving him the book. (Does that make sense?!) I think everything that Faraday knows already when he's fresh off the freighter, he already wrote, 30 years in the past. That's how he knows everything that happens and that's how he knows all the coordinates. I'm sure Eloise wrote some stuff on there as well aside from her note to him. Clearly, she wrote the note knowing she would eventually shoot him so I'm sure she's done more time traveling than she cares to admit.

The book also proves my theory on the rocks Jack takes from "Adam and Eve" in the caves in Season 1. He never makes mention of them again and no one knows he's got them. That's too shady even for this show to not come back and bite us in the ass. My guess is, if it hasn't come back this far into the series... it has something to do with the conclusion. They are sort of on the same cycle as the book. They don't originate from anywhere, they are just circling in time. Jack takes them from a corpse in 200-something and then goes ahead and dies with them years before knowing he would find them and they would help him in some way. The book is given to Present-Faraday by Present-Eloise but Past-Eloise got it from Past-Faraday... and so on. I'm tellin' ya... those stones are coming back. They are also black and white, which seems to be gaining even more importance in the grand scheme of things. Dark vs. Light? Good vs. Evil? Right vs. Wrong? Faith vs. Science? Past vs. Future? I think I'm on to something...

Why does Richard (Eye-Liner-Dude) look like he doesn't know what's going on half the time?
I think he doesn't have a perception of time. I think it's all like one great-big long day to him. He said he "went to visit John" a couple of times. We remember the "testing" for the school when he asks John which of these items is "his" and when John fails to pick out the compass which he gave Richard in the future, Richard dismisses him because he's not "ready" yet. Ready for what? To become their leader?! Clearly, he's a 7year old kid, didn't you notice that, Richard? Or do you not have a damn clue what time or age is?! This would also explain why he doesn't age and can be in 2 spots at the same time. He was in the past as well as in the present. He's got no time line. Locke has to show him proof of his time travels by asking him to pass along a message to his time-shifting-injured self.

Which brings me to Jacob-Enemy-Dude... Let's call him Killer.
So... we can all agree that the "Locke" that was alive again on the Island isn't really "Locke"... We all know his body was found in the plane's cargo and someone else was in his coffin, right? Agreed? Good. Is it safe to assume then that something happened on the plane ride (or prior to) that switched Locke with Killer? Right. Still following? Good. Killer-Lock takes Richard on a little excursion in the woods and makes Richard go tell Time-Shifting-Injured-Locke he'll need to die in order to bring them all back. By doing so, he "kills" Locke and is able to take his place and gain Richard's trust. Richard is so confused and has never seen anyone come back from the dead, but he trusts Locke and brings him to Jacob. This proves to me that Killer's sneeky and tricked Richard into getting Locke killed knowing it would take him to Jacob. Killer's plan all along. (The loop hole is a loop in time, get it?) So I think we can say that Killer killed Lock, not Ben. Does this have anything to do with Ben being able to kill Jacob? No clue.
Clarification of overall ramblings : Richard lead Killer to Jacob. Killer lead Richard to Locke. Locke lead Killer to Jacob.
(Makes you wonder why these people need a leader if they can't even pick one!)

What the hell is Kate's problem?
She thinks the show should be named after her. It's not.

What the hell is Jack's problem?
Jack's in a pickle. I think Jack's outcome is what made sense of it all for me. Here's how :
*flashback to the early days* Jack was the man of Science going against Locke, man of Faith. He's technical, logical and reasonable. All was well (somewhat) on Island Land. Monsters and Others excluded. Every obstacle Jack has to face on and off the Island tests his beliefs. He operates on Ben and saves him. He's programed to saves lives, no matter what. He thinks Locke is nuts for talking about destiny.
When he goes back to the real world, he totally flips around. He becomes a man of faith and doesn't even need a logical reason to go back to the island, he just "knows". Basically, he was only to come back to the Island as a man of Faith. Faith-Jack wouldn't operate on Ben to save his life but Science Jack would have.
Play out the scenario in your head of what would have happened if Jack had still been a man of Science and had gone back to the island and accepted to save Young-Ben? Kate wouldn't have brought Young-Ben to the Others and this show wouldn't make any sense. (!)

Which brings me to my final point!
Jack had to change his future in order to get the past done right... So what's that supposed to mean!? Jack's time line didn't change when he went to the past, it stayed it's course and he had all the knowledge he had before. He needed to have learned lessons from his future in order to be able to change the past. For his future to be what it was, he needed to be convinced about that bomb. If he'd been his logical self, the incident wouldn't have happened.

I think they don't "travel" to the past but the past "travels" to them. They don't move, but suddenly, around them, it becomes 30-years-before.
So suddenly, the whole thing is flipped around. Everything is the opposite of what it seems. Dark vs. Light. Good vs. Evil. Right vs. Wrong. Faith vs. Science. Past vs. Future.

You can't change the past because the future already happened.

Update : Skin situation

So it seems my skin's rebellion is caused by an environmental allergic reaction. Or so I assume.

Friday, my entire face felt like a mask. It was swollen and itchy like all hell... and it was starting to spread to my neck. A friend was nice enough to bring me some Benadryl at work and that stopped the process and now I'm left with bumpy, rough, sensitive skin. It's a healing process though and I've been moisturizing like a mad woman.

I have no clue what could have caused it. I haven't used anything different on my skin. I opened another tube of Glow Enhancer but that's it. I refuse to admit that it might be from the Glow Enhancer. Most of the ingredients are also in most other products I use so it doesn't compute. I also tried a bit on the inside of my arm and it hasn't reacted thus far.

I think it may be something environmental from work. It's the only new thing this week and it started to itch and burn on Thursday. I really have NO idea what it could be. It's not a moldy building or anything...

Well, my skin is doing better, aside from the fact that I've NEVER had sensitive skin before... so this is all new to me! I'll have to slow down on the Vitamin C Micro Refiner for a bit until it gets back to normal. *sob*

Verdict : Dehydration or Allergies.
Investigation : Ongoing.

My skin does not *heart* the prairies.

Itchy. Itchy. Itchy. It. Chy.

My skin wants out, I think. My legs are so dry it hurts to shave. My hands and arms are always itchy and it's like I can feel my skin, crisping like tissue paper when I move. I moisturize everyday with Body Butter (Cocoa!) and nothing seems to cut it. I am working on staying hydrated and not using a small mountain of shower gel on my sponge, still, I don't see any difference. I'm running out of option and I suspect my skin is going to start falling off. Ew.

The worst is my face. Holly jeez, it burns! I got a bit of sunburn on my cheeks and nose from the airshow on Saturday. I Vitamine E'd it up and Aloe'd it all this week. It soothed the redness and the burning. We're down to flaking at this point. Charming, really!

Today, it's hives and irritation. The hole right side of my forehead and from the outside corner of my eye to my hair line is red, swollen a little, itchy as fuck and all bumpy and gross. Ew. I tried exfoliating but then I sat down in a little corner and cried for a bit. Owwwy! I've got a couple of hives on the left side of my neck (don't know where/what those are from!) and those itch like little shits too! I put some Aloe toner on it and sat next to a glass of water and some Benadryl for a bit but now it's gone. I need someone here to slap my hand away everytime I reach for my face. It just keeps getting worst.

Js had warned me that I would have a hard time with my skin out here... but I didn't think it would be this bad. Good thing I stocked up on The Body Shop products before leaving Ottawa but at this rate, my stash won't last me as long as I planned. Ugh!

Airshow 15 Wing

It was a busy day on the grounds of CFB Moose Jaw, today! The base was open to the public for this year's Armed Forces Day airshow. It lasted pretty much all afternoon and it was well worth the last week of very loud (and constant) plane noises. I guess, in some way, it helped make this place feel more real to me. I don't normally go to see Js at work and I'd only been in his "office" once before today. With this posting being so far away and me taking so long to be able to come out here, his workplace has always seemed so distant and felt so unknown to me. Now, to be here and to be able to just walk around, talk to people and enjoy the show, it was great.

It made it feel more like home.

We were able to go up on the tower's "cat walk" or whatever it's called for the show and it was pretty awesome. We had the best view and it was awesome for picture taking. It made me seriously consider getting a better quality camera. We're going to move around a lot so I guess there will always be something new to photograph. I can't usually post the pictures I take around the base when they are practicing for shows or whenever there is something special going on because of security reasons. I usually get a call from the BatPhone to inform me so I stand outside like a moron, camera in hand. This time, I'm allowed because it was open to public so I'm going to take full advantage of it. I understand why we're not allowed, but I'm sure there are people in town, taking pictures and posting them so it kind of annoys me... oh well!

I got some sunburn action going on. It wasn't all that sunny, but I guess the wind didn't help. It's not like there were much shady trees around. My face feels like it's going to fall off even after I loaded it it with a Vitamin E mask and TONS of Aloe Toner and Moisturizer. I hope my nose doesn't get all peely and gross for Monday.

I'm really happy with my day's turnout even if it did make me miss Js a trazillion times more. He's home in 27 days and not a second too soon. He's got a final exam on Monday and then a bunch of official stuff all week before starting on the second second training he was sent out there for. There will be more of his buddies on that course and probably a slightly bigger class too which will help with moral and make the time just fly by.

Bran Misrepresentation

I can't take bran-promoting commercials anymore! I just can't. I refuse to watch them. Period.

This past year, companies have been trying really hard to promote bran products. Is it because it's cheap to produce? I don't know and I don't care for the research... but it got me wondering why it got so important to be regular all of a sudden.

Years ago, you had the occasional Metamucil commercial every once in a while during soap operas and day time television. They were mostly well targeted, bland and very technical campaigns. Then All-Bran decided to explode (pun intended!) everywhere and make bran the latest trend in dieting. It makes me want to hurl. I'm sure they were hoping for the opposite effect, too bad!

(You can't imagine the efforts I'm putting in censoring all the bad jokes. Gratuitous poo-humor amuses me to no end!)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying bran isn't good for you or necessary to a well balanced diet and personally, I really like the taste of All-Bran cereal because I'm weird like that... but I'm also aware that marketing bran as a way to loose weight is just wrong! Some commercials are presenting their product as a preventive, healthy dietary option. Some are presenting it as a way to fit into your jeans. I searched everywhere on YouTube to find a clip of that commercial but I got nothing... Basically the one I'm referring to goes something like this :

*Woman1 tries to button up size 6 pants*
*Creepywoman2 is quietly sitting on a couch behind her, watching the struggle. (Creepy!) Then chimes in and says "I can't let that happen to my friend, so I recommend this brand of cereal" which irks me... see Rant #1*
*Cue the typical white screen and shots of fluffy giant flakes in a bowl and pouring milk*
*Woman1 can finally button up her pants, everyone is happy, I set myself on fire, the end.*

Rant #1 : When my friend is having a bloated day, I'm A) Certainly not watching her dress quietly from the couch in her living room and B) Certainly not going to tell her "You need to lose weight, here, purge yourself by eating some bran and you'll fit in your pants within the next 30 seconds!" I mean, come ON! I'd slap her if I could! As a good friend you are supposed to say "Here, try these looser fitting pants. The bloating will go away in a couple of days, wanna go for coffee?!" No? What about the "Can't let that happen to my friend..." part... I'm pretty sure, my friends are well aware of their body and if I start telling them what to eat and when, I don't think that would go over very well. At least not with me! It's just a common situation, totally blown out of proportion by bad marketing and it just makes me want to scream.

Rant #2 : When the crap *snicker* did it become okay to tell your friends they need to poo more?!

Rant #3 : Eating disorders are not a thing to be fooled around with. This commercial is pretty much saying "Poo more and you'll loose enough weight to fit in your pants!" It doesn't say anything about healthy eating or any other benefit of adding an appropriate portion of bran to your diet. According to SomethingFishy.org, it is not uncommon for a man or woman suffering with Bulimia to take diet pills in an attempt to keep from binging, or to use diuretics to try to lose weight. Sound familiar?! Thought so.

Sure, I may be overreacting, but having studied advertising and having been submersed in branding and consumer behavior, I know how this kind of advertising can affect vulnerable people's habits and alter their perception of reality. Someone suffering from Bulimia who's been trying to dig themselves out of the hole can easily see this as a guilt free way of purging. It's wrong and for a company that wants to promote healthy eating habits, I don't think they are being very considerate.

We always accuse the news and the information media of bending the truth to their advantage, I think we should start digging a bit deeper...